Don't walk away and think you can walk back in like nothing happened!

I wrote a while back about mourning the loss of a friendship. I thought that putting my feelings out there would be therapeutic and it most certainly was. I was able to put all of my feelings out there and it made me feel so much better. I finally felt like I could let go once and for all, and I did. The problem is, this so called "friend" seems to keep popping in and out of my life. I of course accepted the request on Instagram because I am a sucker and wanted to know how she was doing but a couple days after the request and the "Lets be friends again post" with #AB, BAM she was gone again. At that point I decided I was completely done. Then last night, low and behold I have a message from her on Pinterest. I did not answer because I have decided that as much as I cared and still do care about here I am not going to sneak around like we're doing something wrong.

I have realized that it is true, people will learn to treat you based on what you accept from them. If you are in a crappy relationship of any kind but you allow the other party to continue to walk over you then you can lay the blame on yourself. You have to set higher standards for what you will accept if you want to live a better life. With that in mind, I have decided there are a few things I will no longer accept in my life from anyone and here are a few of them:

• I will no longer accept things in my life that are against the very foundations of what I believe.
• This is what ultimately led to the "end" of that friendship. I never said I wouldn't be her friend anymore but I refused to lower my standards to be around the negative people in her life.
• I fought far to hard to distance myself from the negativity that plagued so much of my life in the past. If I am willing to lose family because of their horrible ideals, why would I put up with it from anyone else?
• If you cannot be a part of my life in public, I want nothing to do in private. 
• I put entirely too much of my life on hold to try and solve the problems of other people and I get nothing but pain in return. If it is so easy for you to write me out of your life to make the other people in it happy, then clearly you do not want me around. That being said, do not try to be sneaky and message me in obscure places like Pinterest where you won't be find out.
• Being someone's secret in any fashion is demeaning and self-deprecating. This is something that EVERYONE should realize!
• I will no longer pretend that the pain and hurt people cause me simply did not happen.
• I spent far too much of my life letting this happen in romantic relationships and I'll be damned if I am going to reenact it in so-called friendships. 
• If you walk away from me like I mean nothing to you, then you better believe that you will NOT stroll back into my life like nothing ever happened.
• If someone wants back into my life, they are going to have to show me that they truly want to be in it. 
• Until then...............

I survived my first semester at grad school, Now what?

It has recently come to my attention that I have not written anything here in quite a while... *I am lookin' at you Jess!* I could say that I have been busy with grad school, but I would really have to admit to all the procrastination I did in various other forms: Pinterest, Facebook, perusing Instagram, making crafts, reading non-school related stuff, ect. All the while I SHOULD have been busy with school related things.

I need this pic at my desk!!

I did somehow manage to survive. I turned in all of my projects with like 6 hours to spare, with minimal blood, sweat, and tears! Actually, there was no blood, sweat, and tears involved so clearly EVERYONE should believe in miracles because those projects were freaking tedious! Ever had to write an insanely detailed research proposal for a paper you do not have to write?? It is illogical in every way and it will make you bitter! Nevertheless, I did get them done and I tell you, I put that BA in "BS" to good use! I do not think I have ever pulled so much BS out of nowhere to fluff up a paper and drag it out to the required length. 

As relieved as I am that I have a two week break, I do feel kind of lost. I had the best night sleep I have had in weeks last night because I did not have tons of assignments weighing on my mind. Granted, I have plenty of other things on my mind but that a whole 'nother post! 

I guess now I can see how many books I can read over break to occupy my time! :)